APPROACH CONFLICT AS A COLLABORATOR
“How can we achieve a mutually desirable outcome?”
“How can we collaborate to make this an overall win for our company?”
“How can we partner to solve the problem or system that may have prompted the conflict?”
SPEAK HUMAN TO HUMAN
“This person has beliefs, perspectives, and opinions, just like me.”
“This person has hopes, anxieties, and vulnerabilities, just like me.”
“This person has friends, family, and perhaps children who love them, just like me.”
“This person wants to feel respected, appreciated, and competent, just like me.”
“This person wishes for peace, joy, and happiness, just like me.”
What are my main points?
What matters to me? What matters to the other party?
What are three ways my listeners are likely to respond?
How will I respond to each of those scenarios?
REPLACE BLAME WITH CURIOSITY
“I imagine there are multiple factors at play. Perhaps we could uncover what they are together?
“What ideas do you have?
“What would be your ideal scenario?”
“How could I support you?”